So Much For The Staying Out Of It

Did I say that I was going to just sit back and let B. and G. plan the parents' 40th anniversary party? Yes, I do think I did. And I even believed it for a little while.

With the big day about six weeks away, Dad is getting nervous that nothing has actually been planned. Well, of course it hasn't been planned: The kids are wrapped up in their own lives, and Mom just wants a party. Dad won't make any decisions on his own. He keeps trying to get B., G. and I to sit down and do some face-to-face planning, I think he's starting to realize the futility of that.

A little while back, I met a guy who's been known to do a little catering. I mentioned the theoretical party, and he jumped at it. "Tell me what kind of food they want," he said. "I'll send you a list of suggestions."

"Um... let me get back to you on that one."

What the hell do they want? I still can't get a straight answer. Evening buffet? Afternoon munchies? Gourmet stuff? Hyper-healthy?

We got tired of waiting, so I had my friend send me a bunch of general suggestions, which I forwarded to Dad. He called and said that they were a little too broad, and could I bring him over for a meeting?

"They're broad because I still have no idea what you want to do," I pointed out. "That's the first thing he's going to ask. He doesn't need to be there for that." In more ways than one.

At this point, the idea is to do some planning on Mother's Day. Dad said the kids should be over around 4.

"So that means 5," I said.

"No, that's you. I should have told you 3."

Sigh. "Hi. I'm not the one who's been late the last few times."

"Well, it was raining..."

Whatever.

"I guess I'll be there at 4," I said. "If that's when [B.] can be there, then that's when I'll have to make time."

Dad couldn't argue with that statement. It's not pissy. It's just true.

I know how this is going to go down. B. is going to come in with all these completely unfeasible ideas that sound reasonable on the surface, and be kind of miffed that tentative decisions have already been made. Then she'll say, "I thought you wanted to use that restaurant from last time," and I will patiently point out that time is running very short. Dad will point out that while no decision has been made, he'd rather give a friend of mine a chance -- especially if said friend can guarantee his availability. Which he can.

Yeah, yeah. I should have just stood back and let B. and G. deal with this. I ask you, dear reader: Would you want to be around if Mom were to realize that the party might not happen? I didn't think so. So, I retreat to the old patterns, comforting myself with the notion that at least I get to help a friend.

I think I have to do something really, really monumental, just so I can make the rest of the family throw a party for me, without me pitching in. Sure, benefitting humanity would be nice, but so would a little payback.